Wabi- Sabi: Finding The Beauty In The Mess

Table of Contents

Wabi- Sabi Explained

Our ideals might be the greatest thief of our joy. We live in a world where perfectionism is celebrated but does not exist. We shy away from being vulnerable with ourselves and those around us because of the constant need to showcase what we presume to be the acceptable version of ourselves. In the process, however, most of us tend to live a somber and unhappy life only because we fail to fully embrace ourselves. If you are like me, and you find yourself living in this zone most of the time, maybe it’s time to cultivate the Japanese principle of wabi-sabi in your day-to-day life. Wabi-sabi is centered on the appreciation of the beauty of imperfection, impermanence, and simplicity.

Sen No Rikyu and Wabi Sabi

There was a Japanese monk who was known to practice the wabi-sabi concept in his day-to-day life. Sen No Rikyu is revered as the father of the modern tea ceremony and the most perfect practitioner of Wabi-Sabi. One day he asked one of the workers to clean his tea house, so the young boy worked all day scrubbing and sweeping every inch of the house and garden. When Rikyu came to inspect it, he reached up and shook a maple tree overhanging the path, the sprinkling of leaves that fell brought Wabi-Sabi to the scene.

Applying this same concept in our daily lives might contribute to living a life full of grace for both ourselves and others. Not everything has to be perfect. You can allow yourself to do what you can with the resources that you have. The most important thing is that you show up every day and be your best.

Here are some negative effects of perfectionism in your life

Strained relationships
More prone to anxiety and depression
High chances of not being present in the moment while trying to figure out future projects or tasks.
Impatience & frustration
You tend to respond more harshly in terms of emotions, you experience more guilt, more anger, and more shame

Areas One Can Practice The Concept of Wabi Sabi

1. Relationships

No one is perfect, we all have flaws that we are either working on or yet to acknowledge we have them. Being in a romantic relationship means being open to vulnerability. Without accepting that there is beauty in imperfection, it becomes too difficult to be vulnerable with your partner. Vulnerability is being naked and authentic, and neither one of us is perfect, how then can we be naked without accepting there is beauty in our imperfections?

2. In Your Home

Home is a haven for many and most people strive to keep it clean. This can be stressful if you are obsessively fighting to keep it spotless a hundred percent of the time. Especially with kids around the house, there will always be toys laying around or a chair left tucked out. Finding beauty in the imperfection state of your house is choosing to be grateful for the children that made the mess. Being grateful for the food you cooked and made the dishes dirty. A clean house is great, but you need to make room for a sprinkle of wabi-sabi here ad there.

3. In achieving your goals

When you feel like the process of achieving your goals is not going according to plan, find the beauty in the process. Give yourself a little grace. Celebrate the small milestones and look at failure as an opportunity to restrategize or redirect.

Life isn’t perfect but always find the beauty in the imperfection. That’s wabi-sabi.