What You Are Not Saying “NO” To, You Are Saying “Yes”.

If you are anything like me, saying no to people can be challenging, and no, it’s not always an act of kindness, well, to a certain extent, and on some occasions. In reality, it’s mostly a result of the desire to please people and a lack of strong boundaries. The inability to say no can ruin your personal development journey and keep you from living the life God has intended for you. While this is an entire subject in your personal growth journey, in this post, we will discuss how not saying no can put a glass ceiling on the things you can achieve in your personal development.

Sometimes, as human beings, we tend to go with the flow in our day-to-day lives. We let life happen to us, and marvel several years later as to why we are producing results that we didn’t intend to. I like how Jim Rohn says, In 5, 10, 15, 20 years you will arrive, the question is where? Your “where” is completely dependent on what you do daily until you reach 5 /10  years. In our day-to-day, we passively say yes to the destination we are heading to buy, refusing to say no. Ten years later, one can marvel at how they went from a small size to a plus size, but the truth is, they said yes to the plus-size body with their choices. The diet they are constantly choosing, not exercising, all this is saying yes to the plus-size body.

It doesn’t matter how loud you complain about your job, if you are not actively doing anything about it,  you are saying YES to it, yes in your complacency. Complaining is not saying no; it’s a yes with a sour grumbling attitude. Take note of the areas that you are complaining about and consciously decide to say no to whatever may be causing you to grumble. Drowning in the trap of complaining may cause you to stay in the same position until you choose to change it. If you cannot change it overnight, you might as well change your attitude while at it.

Some of the things that move us further and further from living as the best version of ourselves, a life that God has intended for us to, and we continually say yes to, are very subtle that we don’t see the issue in the moment. This includes burying things that are causing bitterness to compound in a relationship, then you wonder why that relationship with a friend/ sister fell apart. You said yes to the fallout when you chose to sweep under the rug the small issues you have been having. Or when you brushed off checking up on them, or simply sharing something exciting that happened to you. Some of the subtle yeses include choosing to put off a dream that has been on your heart because you are “tired” from your day-to-day responsibilities, causing you to look back ten years from now, wondering why you never got to live the life you wanted. Guess what, you said yes to it by choosing not to say NO to procrastination and laziness masked as rest, while you spent hours scrolling through social media and binge-watching other people live their dreams.

Be intentional in taking inventory of what you are saying yes to by saying no to the things moving you further and further away from your dreams. Your yes will determine where your life will be in the next year or five years from now. Make wise yesses by saying no to the things that don’t align with your personal development journey.

tanyafungai